Sunday 8 January 2017

Twin Mum Wisdom

The other day I popped into my local town with the boys. Typically I was struggling to get around with my buggy. It really annoys me that shops don’t consider wheelchairs and buggies accessibility when placing their displays etc. I used to be really apologetic for knocking over stands, or taking the contents of a shelf with me, quickly putting everything back, but 5 months later and now instead of being embarrassed I get annoyed for a lack of consideration by shops and cafes!
On this specific day I had wanted to pop in to Champneys. Unsurprising they had only one of their double doors openable, giving a gap not suitable for a single buggy, let alone a double. I had to try and flag down a member of staff to unlock the second door.  By the time we got in I was pretty disgruntled. 
I quickly grabbed the product I wanted and headed for the till. A woman that was paying whilst I was struggling to get to the door tapped my arm. She said “Enjoy it!” I wasn’t sure if she was talking about the scrub I had in my hand, or because I had a face of thunder? She must have clocked my puzzled expression, and explained she was also a twin mum. She said her twin girls were now 5, and when she looks back at photographs she has deep regrets that she spent so much time focussing on survival and didn’t actually have time to enjoy them being babies. This is the first time I’d really heard an honest comment. Daily I hear from other twin parents/ grandparents “it’ll get better,” but no specific admission that they struggled. 
I admit it’s hard adjusting to becoming parents. I admit it’s hard functioning on little sleep. I admit I’ve had those moments, where I’ve thought “what have we done?!” Then take that and times it by two. The admiration I have for parents of triplets, quads is off the scale…. I reckon either myself or my husband would have been taken away in a straight jacket!
Her words haven’t left my mind. I now think they are both awake and happy, I’m going to soak it up. Those bottles can wait 10 extra minutes! 
Best piece of advice I have been given, and I hope that one day I can say the same thing to another mother.